Psycho City- Population, Me.

All evidence points to one clear and definite adjective to describe the Hammerhead.. Psycho.

Yea that's me. Let me explain to you how I've come to this realization. Or actually, allow me to tell you in a haiku because as I laughed/kicked myself the next morning I realized such insanity should only be put back together in poetic form. Otherwise, I fear, it's just too pathetic for words.

Hump Day with the ladies

Four Loko, Whiskey, and all things crazy

Invited to a rap show.

Cute boy, in my opinion.

Forgot to eat dinner, Did not forget to drink more.

Dancing asses off.

A broken bra (from dancing)

Hitting on cute boy hard.

Boy says "I have a girlfriend"

Akward Turtle

Stubborn Hammerhead stumbles out.

Kind of regretting calling him out.

FML.

So what makes most of this so akward is that boy is an employee at my local grocery store. God Damn it..... I'm seeing a pattern here. An announcement for my friends out there - if you see me approaching any more Trader Joe employees knock me out with a two by four before I open my mouth cus I'm thinking my luck isn't running too strong there. THANKS.

Everything is okay in Big Sur.

Nostalgia struck me hard today, rolled in like clouds and rained on my parade. Sitting on a hardwood floor thumbing through artwork, I was taken back to Big Sur. For those who know this place, know ecstasy. I am back on my mountain with all of my friends watching the sunset where the west coast comes to an end. On top of the world above the cloudline, feeling your soul sink into the sublime. I miss this home, I miss the dirt that cakes onto your hands, sleeping bag, and your shirt. That is, if you're wearing one...because most often than not you'll be throwing off clothes once you get to the top. I can still smell the whiskey on our breath, feel the wind in my dreads from riding on the top of the beast, and the stab of hitch hikers in my bare feet. Goddess parties, topless in the trees, crying, laughing, drunk on eachother's company. Dancing on the roof, Red Stripes and cigars for breakfast, beer showers, and sunburns. It's all there. It's just me that's not. When I die, throw me off a cliff in Big Sur to rot.

Why today is so terrifying.

This One.

This is Leen. AKA Pooter. Today she turns 21. She may look like a nice girl. All sugar and spice and everything nice. Like here.....
But under that facade of seemingly girl next door demeanor, there is a rampant and wild she wolf cheetah waiting for that 5th shot of tequila that will unleash the beast. I'm pretty sure she's made out of some viscious desert carnivore, electric fence, and a bit of David Bowie. Look at that smirk. It's saying "Danger! I will break everything and everyone the day I'm allowed into a bar."

Terrifying.

Consider yourself warned Planet Earth.

So I was busy this weekend....

Several things on the agenda today...


This weekend I attended The Foundation Breakdance Battle at Bossanova. It was siiiiick. Push Jones got to perform and were even later complimented by the judge and former contestant of America's Best Dance Crew, Do-Knock. Turns out he's a fun guy to party with as well. After having a couple drinks at the battle me, some of the Push ladies, and Do-Knock mosied up the road to The Report for the after party. My heavens.... So many breakdancing people. Twixxx of the Massive Monkey's made an appearance (also from ABDC). After several whiskey/cokes I pulled out my favorite MC Hammer dance move in front of the hip hop professionals. If you're unsure what that looks like, watch this...I am such an idiot sometimes... Day 2 of Foundation was pretty decent too with my duties including PROMOTIONS! Some people scream and run away in fear and the first mention of doing promotion work. I on the other hand love to make an ass of myself in public and talk to large groups of people so I accepted the offer with open arms. That day I was promoting workshop a with Do-Knock and Twixx at my lovely home studio Vega Dance Lab the following day. I made sure everyone who even looked close to being able to dance recieved a flyer :) I found the best strategy if people tried to give the flyers back to was to drop my arms and insist that I had none. Muhahahaha. I'm evil. And uh.. New Push Jones poster by my choreographer's husband, Joe. So cool.

I actually ended up going to that workshop and it was kick ass. When I say kick ass I mean it kicked my ass. Today I am brandishing bruises and sore muscles. Apparently Do-Knock is a beast when it comes to choreography and it turned out to be most welcome. I was pushed. It was good. FEEL THE BURN! Twixxx ended up teaching a sort of freestyle workshop on how to jump into dance circles. I feel like I've always been pretty comfortable with this. My issue is getting some new material. The hammer can only take me so far, right? By the end of the class, I was exhausted but soo happy to have gone and been able to experience the talent these two dudes have to offer, let alone their kindess. Good people. Here's a video of them both. Be impressed.

Tuck and Roll Grandma.

7 more days now until I will be back in the bay. Hmph. I feel like there is so much going on and yet I feel devoid of any real motivation. Today is humpday. Today is also my day off, so I should be completing the chores that have stocked up over the past few days (and by days I mean weeks). BUT low and behold, here I am wading in a pile of mismatched socks and underwear.

Woke up early this morning to ride River. We decided to stick with some arena work today seeing as though last time I got thrown off on trail. It wasn't too bad. A duck jetted out from the undergrowth and River, being a young spritely thing shit himself and freaked. I nearly stayed on but once he realized there was a strange creature now clinging to his side, he spooked more and I was thrown to the ground. Tuck and Roll Grandma! (best advice ever) I was very lucky, however, to not get kicked as he reared away. Poor guy. He just stood there afterwards waiting for me with a look on his face like "wha happend?" I got up relatively unharmed. Just some sore ribs and a bloody finger nail. Best thing to do in situations like that is get back up and start riding. As days passed a solid bruise has formed on my forearm. Lovely.

Push Jones will be having 2 performances this week (excited arms shaking in the air). I'm most excited about the one that will be happening this Saturday in Hood River after the Fashionation fashion show. We will be dancing at the after party in some club. I hear the night life in Hood River is pretty happenin though so I better wear my big girl undies for that one. That's right. I'm also casually considering sneaking in a flask of whiskey because I have a cute flask that doesn't get near enough use and because I'm cheap. Suddenly I am overwhelmed with the urge to sit at home and drink whiskey in granny panties... weird.
Aside from that La Honda is within my grasp. Having some odd feelings about that right now though. Hopefully it is a passing mood. Currently I am trying not to acknowledge them in hopes that they will go away. I'll keep you informed as anticipation builds.

And yet another digression. I have been dreaming quite vividly again recently and a lot of them usually involve work. This makes me feel strange. I spend all day working, can't I have my dreams to be able to let go and rest! Waaahnee! FML.