Psycho City- Population, Me.

All evidence points to one clear and definite adjective to describe the Hammerhead.. Psycho.

Yea that's me. Let me explain to you how I've come to this realization. Or actually, allow me to tell you in a haiku because as I laughed/kicked myself the next morning I realized such insanity should only be put back together in poetic form. Otherwise, I fear, it's just too pathetic for words.

Hump Day with the ladies

Four Loko, Whiskey, and all things crazy

Invited to a rap show.

Cute boy, in my opinion.

Forgot to eat dinner, Did not forget to drink more.

Dancing asses off.

A broken bra (from dancing)

Hitting on cute boy hard.

Boy says "I have a girlfriend"

Akward Turtle

Stubborn Hammerhead stumbles out.

Kind of regretting calling him out.

FML.

So what makes most of this so akward is that boy is an employee at my local grocery store. God Damn it..... I'm seeing a pattern here. An announcement for my friends out there - if you see me approaching any more Trader Joe employees knock me out with a two by four before I open my mouth cus I'm thinking my luck isn't running too strong there. THANKS.

Better untitled emo bs.

The act is all too consuming, and then you're shrooming
and suddenly, the situation is so dire and sad you want to laugh
The oil spills, trillion dollar bills, and the lonely that sticks at your side like a friend with nothing better to do.
I could crush a can in my fist every time I feel pissed from watching cute indie couples kiss.
I could shut all the windows, watch stupid tv. shows and forget our huge fucking debt exists.
But that isn't very helpful is it?
I'll start with a shower to scrape this sadness off my skin.

Everything is okay in Big Sur.

Nostalgia struck me hard today, rolled in like clouds and rained on my parade. Sitting on a hardwood floor thumbing through artwork, I was taken back to Big Sur. For those who know this place, know ecstasy. I am back on my mountain with all of my friends watching the sunset where the west coast comes to an end. On top of the world above the cloudline, feeling your soul sink into the sublime. I miss this home, I miss the dirt that cakes onto your hands, sleeping bag, and your shirt. That is, if you're wearing one...because most often than not you'll be throwing off clothes once you get to the top. I can still smell the whiskey on our breath, feel the wind in my dreads from riding on the top of the beast, and the stab of hitch hikers in my bare feet. Goddess parties, topless in the trees, crying, laughing, drunk on eachother's company. Dancing on the roof, Red Stripes and cigars for breakfast, beer showers, and sunburns. It's all there. It's just me that's not. When I die, throw me off a cliff in Big Sur to rot.

Da Bizness

So I wrote half of this a few days ago and the rest today. Considering rapping it or using it for slam poetry sometime. Feedback is encourged. Thanks. So I'm sitting here pondering life in my fist
thinking "there's really no need to get pissed
cus I work everyday and I'm still poor as fuck."
Just a material girl a little down her on luck.
But that got me going down another thought path
You know I'm actually well off if you consider the math...
I've got shoes on my feet, air in my lungs
Live in the land of the free so I can still purchase guns
And what more could you ask for in this day and age?
You can still live like kings and yet be slaves to the wage
But I'll be the first to admit that I don't have it all
Remembering the adage "oh how the mighty do fall"
Live as simple as you can and I'm sure that you'd find
that real value is locked in your heart and your mind.
Not your iphone, your laptop, your high tech contraptions
Though I have my fair share and they are lovely distractions
Just please don't forget that you are here with a purpose
We're all little acts in this huge freak show circus
And we're only as strong as our weakest of links
So we're all going down if this fucking ship sinks...

Regarding our origins

Here's a little blurb I wrote the other day after reading the Urantia Papers for a few hours in the sections titled "First Human Family" and "Evolution Overcontrol". I wrote this small ryhme to basically sum up the chapters.

You see it all starts with a sea sponge inhabiting the shoreline

Representing the borderline between animal and vegetable

It's contestable to say that life matter came from cosmic splatter

left uninvested by superior planning.

Our stab in the dark planet, that was meant to be Satanic

made quite a name for itself in years to come

Apes got some will, made weapons to kill,

and a pair of twins left home pretty young

At this point it's all about breeding,

interweaving of genetic lines till you're able to find

a proper mate with desireable traits so we can fuse, body, spirit, and mind.

So that's the synopsis of those chapters. Hmm...History.. Hmm..

MC Gift Rap is on her way back.

Used to know a man who considered his art
to be tearing all the people who had loved him apart.
And looking back on it now I guess I'd call him a boy.
A boy who hated his mother,
and treated women like toys.
But don't really think that I can blame him for that
He's just a product of a broken home and Jack Kerouac.
All philosophy and novels just to find him some reason.
Then he'd chew it up and spit it out with the change of the season.
For example on that morning I woke up on the couch
thinking "where could he be hiding in a single bedroom house?"
Had a pretty good idea went to the room and walked in
And you were kinda hookin up and she was kinda my friend
So if you couldn't tell there's still a bit of lingering angst
cus I was always there for you, and this is how you say "thanks?"

A little something for the kids..

These days pass like tired old work horses
Hallucinating in their sadness, the beasts bear my burden
Climbing steps for smiles only to bear the false fruit of future events
I am caught in limbo. I am bending backwards.

In the passenger seat, a stolen kiss
Airport sadness and a stiff drink to salt the fresh wound
Self medication and deprivation.
but settling for imaginary friends.

An insatiable appetite for satisifaction is being sedated with water and wine.
I am the drunk girl at the wedding and I will not last forever. Come find me.

Photo Cred; Deviantart.com